Crack of Sunlight

As much as I complain about my cleaning job and a lack of proper employment, occasionally I do actually enjoy the time I have to myself afforded to me by only working in the evenings.

A few days ago, after spending well over an hour filling in a job application, I decided to do myself some lunch, a quick and non-nutritous meal of super noodles and toast. And instead of watching TV whilst I ate, something I always do, I broke with tradition and sat on the floor in front of the sliding doors leading into the garden. I opened the door so I could get the air and the sun’s warmth but it wasn’t warm enough to sit outside entirely, and there I sat, admiring my dad’s garden, watching the birds come and go as I ate.

It reminded me of a scene from Eat, Pray, Love. In the book, Elizabeth Gilbert is in Italy, the first leg of her trip to get over a horrible divorce, and she writes,

“I went and sat in a patch of sunbeam on my clean wooden floor and ate every bite of it … happiness inhabited my every molecule”

I had created my own version of this. A simple act that really is just living in the moment and enjoying your surroundings. I felt calm, peaceful, and relieved that I managed to find a job that I liked the look of and I’m perfect for. I was also a little proud of myself for not switching on the idiot’s lantern.

That little moment of happiness reminded me that I should take more moments like this. Just because I’m jobhunting, it doesn’t mean I have to stare at the computer screen all day, getting fed-up and worked-up over lack of jobs I actually want to do or will be good at; just 20 minutes to eat lunch in peace, or to read, or to just do nothing, needs to be squeezed in every now and then to stop me from going insane.

A little hint though if you plan to do this yourself… If you are seeking a moment of peace, make sure nobody can disturb you. My peace was disturbed by my parents coming home. typical really.


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