I read a blog recently, by Dana Claudat, about how lots of things are beyond our control, and that we need to accept this in order to let things happen to us.
The main point of this article is that you “have no control over the outcome of many many situations”, and I realised that in my own life it is this lack of control of so many things that is causing me to take control of other things. I’m becoming a bit of a control freak.
Once I have sent of my CV or application form for a job, I cannot control what happens – if I get the job or even if my cv gets read. I can’t control people, forcing them to like me; and I can’t control my ideas or force myself to write something. By trying to control something, you make it too rigid and structured, which doesn’t help you to achieve anything.
Dana Claudat also discusses the “concept of impermanence” in this article; the idea that, good or bad, nothing is ever permanent. Everything will somehow come to an end; jobs, relationships, friendships, everything will end.
Once we embrace this idea of impermanence and relinquish control over every little thing, we can open ourselves up to a more free-flowing state of mind, way of life.
Control, after all, “is a way of trying to get what you want and make it permanent”, a feat that will always fail, as everything, according to Avenue Q, is only for now, good or bad.
And while some aspects of control are good; looking after your health, or deciding not to be with people who are social vampires are examples of some control that we can exercise; in the end trying to control every aspect of your life, or the outcomes of situations is just a colossal waste of your time.
I definitely think going with the flow, and letting whatever happens happen, you will yourself more open to possibilities, but I don’t think giving up control will be an easy thing, especially when you want something really bad.